Yes, You Can Have It All! Overcoming One of the Biggest Limiting Beliefs Among Successful Women Entrepreneurs [ep. #270]
You can have it all. A thriving business, a deeply connected relationship, incredible health, time with your family, and actual fun. So why does it feel like the moment one area starts going well, another one falls apart? That's the question that I hear as a mindset coach for women all the time!
In today’s episode, I am diving into the self-sabotage behaviour that so many successful women entrepreneurs experience without even realising it. Your business picks up and suddenly your relationship and business feel like they are in competition. You finally prioritise your health, and the revenue dips. You spend time with your family, but your brain is still mentally plugged into work.
I am walking you through exactly why your subconscious does this, the limiting beliefs driving it, and how to start the subconscious reprogramming that allows you to hold more without one area costing the other. I am sharing my own experiences with this pattern, from motherhood to relationships to health, and giving you powerful journal prompts to start shifting this today.
If you have ever told yourself that something has to give, this one is going to change everything. Because yes, you can have it all!
Topics covered on You Can Have It All:
Why your subconscious only lets you win in one area at a time and the self-sabotaging habits keeping that pattern alive.
The real reason your relationship and business feel like they cannot coexist and how to balance relationship and work without guilt.
How limiting beliefs about success, love, and ambition are running the show behind the scenes.
The work-life balance women actually deserve versus the version we have been settling for.
Navigating business and motherhood and why you can have it all without becoming a different person.
Proof that having it all is not about doing everything at once; it is about holding multiple things without your brain forcing you to sacrifice one.
The journal prompts to help you stop asking "why can't I have both?" and start believing you can have it all.
"The more I prioritise myself and my health, the better and the more successful I become. That is a belief that I have now ingrained."- Rebecca Haydon
Journal Prompts on the ‘You Can Have It All’ Belief:
Business vs. Relationships
As you think about the version of you who holds both a thriving business and a deeply connected relationship in the way that you want it, what does she know about herself that you are still learning?
When you imagine looking back a year from now, and you are having and holding both, what belief about love and ambition did you finally let go of?
What would become possible in your relationship (or being open to having a relationship) when you stop using your business as proof that you're unavailable for that?
What does it feel like to realise that one never actually needed to cost the other?
Business vs. Health
What actually becomes available to your business when your body is properly resourced in the way that it needs to be, instead of running on coffee fumes?
Imagine the version of you six months from now who prioritised her health and her business together. What did she stop believing about what success requires from her?
When you ponder and look at the most successful version of you, the one who has sustained that for years, what does she look like?
If taking care of your body wasn't taking time away from your business but was actually giving you the capacity to finally hold more, have more, do more, and be more from an energetic and sustainable point of view, what would that look like?
Business vs. Family
What would your kids say they actually need from you? Is it your constant availability, or is it your full presence when you are together?
When you imagine them as adults looking back, what do you want them to remember? That you were always there but really resentful, or that you were building something you loved, that they could see that passion, and then you were fully present when it actually mattered?
Think about a version of you who is both an incredible mother and a wildly successful business owner. What did she stop sacrificing to prove the worth of motherhood?
What becomes possible when you model for your children that ambition and love are not in competition?
Business vs. Fun
What becomes magnetic about you when you are genuinely enjoying your life instead of just trying to grind through it?
As you imagine the version of you who's built this sustainable success that you want, is she miserable, or is she having the time of her life?
When you think about why you started this business in the first place, was it to create a life that you love? Right now, are you in a life that you tolerate?
Connect with Rebecca Haydon:
Resources mentioned in this episode:
Transcription:
Our AI tried its best, but expect a few quirky typos in the transcript. Embrace the imperfections and enjoy the read!
Ever notice how your business thrives, then your relationship tanks? Or you finally prioritise health and revenue dips? That's not coincidence—it's self sabotage behaviour. Your subconscious has limiting beliefs convincing you that winning everywhere at once is dangerous, so it sabotages one area to keep you "safe."
Through real stories and the Wheel of Life framework, I'm breaking down exactly why successful women entrepreneurs unconsciously sacrifice relationships, health, family time, and fun the moment another area flourishes.
We're diving into self sabotaging habits, work life balance struggles, and how to actually stop self sabotaging through subconscious reprogramming. The truth? You can have it all—thriving business, deep relationships, vibrant health, present parenting, and genuine joy. You just need to teach your subconscious that excelling everywhere isn't dangerous. It's sustainable.
[00:00:00] Hello, my gorgeous lady, and welcome back to the subconscious expert. Oh, it's gonna be a juicy one. I just know it. I just absolutely know it. Today we are having a little look at capacity, but we are not just concentrated on the business anymore. No, no, no. Because actually when you work with me, when you are in my world.
[00:00:24] Even, to be honest, just listening to the podcast, you don't even have to be like, in my world, we focus on. A lot of areas because how you do one thing is how you do everything. And there is such a gorgeous domino effect that happens when we work with the subconscious because we are, yes, changing neural pathways and beliefs and habits and identities in one area of your life, but actually it can have massive impacts on other areas of your life as [00:01:00] well.
[00:01:00] And. We're kind of getting a little bit Wheel of Lifey today. You know, one of the first things I ever learned as a coach literally makes me feel sick thinking about the wheel of life. It's that boring. However, there is scope to it because I want to talk about the woman who can hold more, and that's you, because I want you to be the kind of woman.
[00:01:24] Who holds a thriving business and has a fricking amazing relationship and has incredible, um, passion for her health and time with your kids. If you have any time with your friends, what? Wherever you are in life, wherever you are in life, I want us to get to a place where you can have it all. Yes, yes, yes.
[00:01:53] Because what I see all the fricking time, and look, I was here, I was here. Um, [00:02:00] and I'm gonna talk into my experience today as well, where you have this, uh, time where your business picks up and then. Maybe your relationship gets neglected or you start randomly picking faults in your relationship because your business is doing so well, or you finally, um, prioritize your health and then boom, the revenue dips, or you spend time being present with your family.
[00:02:26] Um, well. I say present, you're not present because your brain is still like mentally plugged into your work and you are going about your day. And this is how it is. Like you, you are literally telling yourself, this is just how it is because I can't have it all. Like something has to give, the other shoe has to drop.
[00:02:46] Insert your beliefs around the fact that you can't have it all. But what if, listen to me. What if that's not actually true? What if that's not actually true? What if the [00:03:00] reason right now that one area is suffering when another one is thriving? Maybe it has nothing to do about time or energy or. Insert any other bullshit excuse you're making up right now.
[00:03:16] What if it's because your subconscious has decided you are only allowed to win in one place at a time? Yeah, my subconscious thought the same too. So today we're gonna walk through the Wheel of life. I wish I'd thought of a, of an a sexier name for that, to be honest for this podcast episode. But we're gonna have a look at the major areas that matter to you.
[00:03:41] And these are kind of major areas that I see come through on questionnaires that my one-to-one clients fill out. That is their business, that is their relationships, that is their health, that is their family, that is their friends. That is their personal growth. That is their fun. Even, [00:04:00] and I really want to show you today exactly why your subconscious makes you sacrifice one when another goes well.
[00:04:07] I've got a couple of funny stories that really like are ingrained in my mind when I was playing this subconscious sabotage pattern out. Very excited to share them. I think I probably have shared them on the podcast before, but we're gonna have a look at that and more importantly, how to stop fricking doing that because you can have it all.
[00:04:27] And I know, and I want to preface, having it all doesn't mean doing it all at the same time. I know that, but it means actually being able to hold multiple things very well or very successfully, or with so much joy and excitement without one cost in the other. Let's fricking dive in. So before we get into kind of like the specific areas, I want to actually cover this kind of pattern that I see, like what's actually happening [00:05:00] when you sacrifice one area for another.
[00:05:03] So when we look at the subconscious. It's balance. It's balance, right? So the maybe perhaps your business is thriving, your subconscious is kind of looking around being like, okay, but you know, what are we neglecting? What are we neglecting? Oh, the relationship. We, we actually better create some conflict there.
[00:05:24] So we're not winning everywhere. And if you are coming to the table with the belief that you can either have one or the other, or, um. You can't have both, which I know is just exactly the same, but these sort of beliefs around the fact that you can't have it all, and a lot of my clients have this belief, this is why I'm talking about this so much because I am seeing it come up so much right now.
[00:05:51] So the business is thriving. And if you are driving from that belief of like, uh, you know, only one thing can be going well at a time, your subconscious is [00:06:00] like, oh fuck. Well the business is going really well. So, you know, her belief system says that only one thing can go well at a time. So let's create a big fight.
[00:06:09] Let's have a big fight. Um, and one of my examples that sticks so. So much in my mind is that I remember back in Australia and quite frankly, the relationship that I was in was, and not the relationship I wanted to be in. But that's beside the point. We'll talk about that on another podcast. Um, however, I remember the business doing really well, and I remember getting so.
[00:06:31] Angry about him leaving the cupboard doors of the kitchens open. I mean, quite frankly, rightly so. 'cause it's really fucking annoying. Like if you've opened a cupboard, just close it. You can feel the anger I still have towards that. But no, I, I remember being like, why am I getting so angry about a kitchen cupboard?
[00:06:50] And then I was like, ah, yes, it's because the business is going really well, for example. So like all of these things, you know, whether you are finally prioritizing your [00:07:00] health, um, your brain will like start scanning for like, what's slipping? Oh, oh, oh, oh. Actually revenue's down a little bit this month. See, you can't have it.
[00:07:11] You can't have it all. Or on the flip side, which is what happened to me, is that you finally start prioritizing your health. This was a couple of years ago and the business fucking flew. Crazy. The more I prioritize myself and my health, the better and the more successful I become. That is a belief that I have now ingrained, but I like.
[00:07:32] Was like, oh my God, well I've gotta stop working out because this is actually working and oh my God, the, the business is going and ah, this feels scary. So your subconscious really, and you might have noticed a couple of these patterns without me even talking about the areas that I'm talking about in today's podcast episode, but you might have started to notice some of these areas already.
[00:07:52] Your subconscious is kind of trying to keep you in this, um, equilibrium. It's a nice word. [00:08:00] Um, because actually if the belief system behind you is that winning in every area is um. Insert whatever belief you have, you know, your tempting fate or it, the shoe's gonna drop or the, the, the further up the ladder we go, the further it is to fall whatever belief you have around, like, not being able to have the fricking life that you want and all of it.
[00:08:27] Together, it's gonna sabotage and it's never conscious as we know. It just makes and finds a way to make sure that you are not fri thriving. Ew. You are not thriving everywhere at once. And I think until you actually understand that mechanism, that was like a big one for me. You are just keep thinking that you just can't have it all because your subconscious just keeps proving that.
[00:08:50] But actually. I'm laying it out on the table. You can, because I have, and you just need to teach your subconscious that thriving in multiple areas [00:09:00] isn't dangerous. It's not, let me tell you, it's actually very sustainable. It's very enjoyable. It's a great life. So area number one that I see. So much is business and relationships.
[00:09:16] This is kind of where I see the most obvious sabotage. Um. Business is going well. You are selling, maybe revenues up, maybe the momentum started to build, and then your relationship. And whether that's, you know, a, a love relationship or friend relationships, whatever relationship you wanna insert here. But those relationships maybe start to feel like a little bit tense or maybe there's like some small arguments happening or.
[00:09:47] Maybe a little bit of disconnection between you. Maybe you stop having sex altogether, or maybe your, um, partner makes a comment about how much you are working, or maybe they start to question. [00:10:00] Like, oh, like, oh my God, she's actually doing it right. Okay. I need to bring her back down a peg or two, whatever, whatever map of the world your partner is in.
[00:10:08] Look, we can discuss that on another podcast episode, but you feel guilty. You start to feel quite resentful. You f you start to feel quite torn with like, oh my God. Like, okay, well I can either grow the business or I can have a relationship that's. Better. And actually you start to tell yourself like, I can't grow the business without sacrificing that relationship.
[00:10:34] Which is not the truth because if your subconscious has a belief that success in business will cost you love, um, I mean it's gonna prove that to be true. And there is a lot of clients who have come to me with that exact belief. Um. For example, maybe you watched a parent work constantly and miss everything.
[00:10:57] Um, maybe you have heard [00:11:00] a lot of stories about successful women like losing their marriages, like becoming divorced. I, I mean, in my mind straight away, just because I fricking love the film, but like the intern, if you've watched the intern, it's Anne Hathaway and um, Robert. Robert De Niro. No, that's not right.
[00:11:21] What's his name? You know the guy. Um, but like, there is the, this big plot and this big story that she has scaled this massive company, CEO, of this massive company that scaled really quickly and her, um, partner has an affair because she's that. Unre in their relationship, for example. So there's like evidence around us, right?
[00:11:42] That the more successful the woman is, the more love they don't get to have. Um, and you know, sometimes as well I see like that kind of like ambition, um, has always felt like something that you had to apologize for. So you kind of make yourself smaller in the relationship. That's [00:12:00] exactly what happened in my previous relationship.
[00:12:03] Um, I was. I mean, I'm sc ambitious, um, and always will be. And it is like a massive part of my being and I love it. And I was like growing and growing and growing and he kind of didn't want to, and I had to either be okay with that or had to go, is this actually the relationship that I'm supposed to be in?
[00:12:28] And, you know, I ended up choosing to leave that relationship and you know, now I'm with Jack. Huh. I mean, we are growing together every week, especially having ivy. I think you grow a lot from having a child, but he is as ambitious and as driven himself, which I love. And I, and I'm not saying that I needed that, but actually he just supports me more than I have ever been supported in my whole entire life.
[00:12:59] Like minus [00:13:00] mom and dad, like of course, but like. I have never known anyone back me and love me and praise me the way that Jack does. And I am allowed to have that ambition and that drive, and he's allowed to have his, and we can support each other th from that, so. It just kind of, we just need to start to have a look at where this belief has come from with like this, like kind of, it can either be the business or be the relationship.
[00:13:31] Another thing that I see obviously is that we do become obsessed with our business and your boundaries are pretty shit. So you actually never leave enough time to have a loving relationship. That's something else for another podcast episode, but, you know, can, you can start to see where you're sacrificing one to the other.
[00:13:48] Um, so. In this pattern, for example, when your business starts going well, your brain then starts to look for evidence. If it is the relationship and how to [00:14:00] deteriorate that, it will, it will literally find it. Um, you'll start to get annoyed by things like their breathing or how they pull food off a fork, um, that you probably wouldn't have noticed if your Raz wasn't trying to find it.
[00:14:15] Or to be honest, you will, you will actually create. Situations like you'll, you'll start to withdraw. Or, um, maybe you'll pick fights like feeling guilty for working when your partner literally hasn't said anything. Like maybe you'll start to like mentally check out when you're together, you'll still thinking about work.
[00:14:35] You'll start to like pick things apart that don't need to be pick picked apart. Um. And actually you'll then use that disconnection as proof. 'cause then it's like, well see. Can't have both, can I? Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. Um, but actually the disconnection didn't come from the business did it? Like it came from the subconscious belief that thriving actually costs you love.
[00:14:58] I am wondering whether this is [00:15:00] hitting hard for a, for some of you right now. So what are we gonna do about it? We're gonna have a little reprogram around this. Um, so a couple of questions, and I'm gonna pop these questions into the show notes if you want to just spend a little bit of time going through this yourself.
[00:15:15] But the first thing I want you to ponder on is like, as you think about the version of you who holds both. A thriving business and a deeply connected relationship in the way that you want it. What does she know about herself that you are still actually learning? Like when you imagine looking back from a year from now, a year from this podcast, and you are having and holding both, what belief about love and ambition did you finally let go of?
[00:15:49] Hmm. Yes. What would become possible in your relationship or if you are not in a relationship, to be open to having a relationship when you [00:16:00] stop using your business as proof that you're unavailable for that. Just kind of notice yourself being fully present with your partner whilst your business thrives.
[00:16:11] You know, what does it feel like to realize that actually one never actually needed to cost the other? So there's just a couple of things I want you to ponder on around that. Spend a bit of time if that one really hits you with this kind of relationship versus business. Okay. Area two is. Business again versus health.
[00:16:36] I will tell you, I will die on the hill that pretty much every single one of my clients puts on their, um, hypnosis form that they wanna drink more fucking water. Like, so maybe you have decided to finally commit to prioritizing your body, or you are moving more, or you are eating well, or you're sleeping properly.
[00:16:59] [00:17:00] Let me know how that feels, by the way. 'cause I just don't think I'll ever get that for a couple of. Years, thank you, Ivy. But you're feeling incredible, right? And two things that happen. Either the business slows down or the business ramps up and it feels really scary. So your brain like immediately connects the dots to be like, oh my God, C Like when we focus on health, our business suffers.
[00:17:21] Or when I focus on health, my business thrives and fuck, I can't hold that. Eject, eject, eject. So you abandon that like health routine. You throw yourself back into the hustle, you throw yourself back into the work. You are really fucking tired. You're not looking after yourself. You're having a cup of coffee at 9:00 AM and not eating for the whole day because you've just got work to do and the cycle repeats.
[00:17:46] So with this, and I know that I'm kind of talking about two opposing beliefs within this, and I just wanted to cover both because I was way more the whole, like when I work out, my business does even better and oh my God, that feels scary. But you [00:18:00] could have the opposite as well. Like you could have your subconscious beliefs that business success requires that.
[00:18:06] Sacrifice and the sacrifice to override your body. And I think that is a huge, huge one that a lot of my clients go through. Um, skipping meals, working late, like in ignore, completely ignoring your body's signals like you are pushing through exhaustion all the time. Um. Because actually if you are taking time out, if you are taking care of yourself, like you must not be working hard enough, like surely.
[00:18:35] So actually then when you start prioritizing your health, the subconscious panics, it scans for evidence that this is costing you both success or failure, and it will find it now. Again, it wasn't the gym. It, it wasn't the, it, it wasn't the, the, the water that you're drinking. It's probably because you stopped selling and you [00:19:00] mentally checked out and all of the things that had nothing to do with the health.
[00:19:03] In fact, the health side of things is probably helping you. Very, very much so. I would say so, yes. We want to have a little ponder on this if you've got this, if you are sitting in the area of business versus health, and I can either have one or the other couple of questions I want you to have a little ponder on like what actually becomes available to your business when your body is actually resourced in the way that it needs to.
[00:19:32] Instead of running on coffee fumes. Like, imagine the version of you six months from now who prioritized her health and her business together. What did she stop believing about what success requires from her? Like when you ponder and look at the most successful version of you, the one who has sustained that [00:20:00] for years.
[00:20:01] What does she look like? Like if taking care of your body wasn't taking time away from your business, it was actually giving you the capacity to finally hold more, have more, do more, be more from an energetic and like sustainability point of view, what would that look like? It probably makes you look a little bit more magnetic, a bit more productive.
[00:20:28] We know what happens when we look after ourselves. That's why we don't do it because we like to sabotage, don't we? Yes. Um, so little bit of a ponder there on the health next one that I see, um, and quite frankly. A big one that I had to learn over the last couple of years is like business versus family.
[00:20:48] Um, I know this one's not going to completely resonate with everyone, um, but I wanted to cover it. So this one is kind of big for the, for the women that I work with who have kids. Um. [00:21:00] Like you're building the momentum, the business is thriving, and then the guilt, the fricking guilt, like you are distracted at dinner or you can't like stop your brain from processing what you need to do whilst you're playing with your kids.
[00:21:17] And it might not be your kids. It might be like family. When you are like going to see your own family, like your parents or your caregivers or whatever, that your aunties, your uncles, your nan, your granddad, like whatever that is. You are mentally somewhere else, even when you are physically there. Um, and I know like this was a big, uh, it literally makes me feel sick talking about it because it was such a big one for me that like I was a bad mom because I still wanted the ambition and I did not want to become this like mompreneur identity.
[00:21:48] In fact, I made, um. I was chatting to someone the other day and I was like, I have like deterred so much from not becoming a mompreneur. I don't think half my audience knows that I [00:22:00] actually have a child. Um, so that is something that I'm working on. But like, oh God, the guilt that I had to work through when I first had Ivy was mad because going into pregnancy and, you know.
[00:22:13] It Ivy was planned, so we, I mean, we planned her to the day. Um, and lo and behold it happened. And I know that doesn't happen a a lot of the time, but she was planned and it still fucking freaked me out when I found out that I was pregnant because I was like, oh my God. Like now, like can I be the person that I have been and can I be, um, like, can I be the.
[00:22:43] The ambitious business owner who wants to do what she wants to do and be a mom, like the best mom ever. And to be honest, I really didn't believe that I could, and this is why I kind of wanted to speak about this, because [00:23:00] I felt like I was, it was either choosing business or choosing my kids. Um, and. When I had Ivy, I was actually, weirdly, again, like the most magnetic in the business than I've ever been.
[00:23:17] Um, like, ah, it just really connected me to something so much deeper. Like I, it was like a new sense of self when I had Ivy and the moment that I had her and I was like, oh my God, I can, like, I, I literally can have both and I love her to. Absolute death. She, she's at an age at the moment that is testing me, but oh my God, the times that I have with her, she's obsessed with me at the moment because we're in the separation anxiety period.
[00:23:46] But it's just so special. And I go and get her from nursery and she does do nursery, uh, four times a week. So I understand that is very different. Um. [00:24:00] The times that I like, you know, I clock out of work at three 50, well half, three to like get ready three 50. I pick her up at four and I do not touch my phone, go on my phone like connect with the business at all from the moment that I pick her up.
[00:24:16] We are Play-Doh in, we're playing with Baby William, who is actually a girl baby, but. My dad decided to call up William, so now it's Baby William. Uh, you know, like, and I'm just like, I get to have it all. Like I get to have both and the business hasn't suffered a fucking thing. Like if, if anything, I've carried on scaling tenfold.
[00:24:40] I mean, I've launched the subconscious institute last year when she was. You know, only a few months old. So like, actually like it was just such an incredible evidence builder for me. Um, and I think there's a lot of beliefs and there is a lot of beliefs that come from this because I think it's a societal belief to be honest, [00:25:00] because there's a subconscious belief that I had that was like being a present mother and being a successful business owner.
[00:25:07] Like, no, like you can be one or the, you can be the other. Like you can be thriving in business, but you're fucking failing in motherhood. Um, so that was like. Really what I had to work on, and I know a lot of other moms really deal. I mean, mom guilt is like something that I have never experienced before and I don't think you ever stop feeling that.
[00:25:27] I ask my mom all the time, she's like, no, Beck, I still feel that. Now. Now. And you are 33, so. I know that's something that we're always working with, but like, it's something that my clients discuss with me if they are moms, or to be honest, I've got a lot of people in my audience who want to become moms, and I want to be the person that shows them that they can still have both.
[00:25:47] Um, and it's about, yes, getting rid of the lim, the, the beliefs around that, the limiting beliefs that you have around that, but also being able to have the structure underneath your business that you can be both, [00:26:00] um. Yeah. Powerful. Powerful. So couple of things, if you are more so in this camp, again, sorry, to those who don't have children, who was like, I can't resonate with anything you're saying right now, but we needed to go there.
[00:26:14] Um, but couple of questions like. What would your kids say they actually need from you? Is it your constant availability or is it actually your full presence when you are actually together? This is the one that I always, always come back to and I'm thinking about Ivy is like when you imagine them as adults looking back, what do you want them to remember?
[00:26:40] Do you want them to remember that you were always there but you were really resentful, or that you were building something that you fucking loved, that you were so passionate about that they could see that passion, and then you were fully present when it actually mattered? Like, think about a version of you who is both an incredible mother [00:27:00] and a wildly successful business owner.
[00:27:03] What did she stop sacrificing to actually prove like this worth of motherhood? Like what becomes possible when you model for your children that ambition and love, they're not in competition. Uh, it's just so powerful for me and I really want to, I really want Ivy to see me go after my goals and go after my dreams.
[00:27:26] I wanna teach her that she can do that too. So. And before I get emotional, I've already got goosebumps. Let's move on. Right. Last area that I wanna talk about is kind of business and fun. If I'm honest, I don't think we have enough fun because it's the business or it's doing the washing or it's sleeping.
[00:27:47] I need you to inject a little bit more fun, but I. I know sometimes, or right now that the business, you know, if the business is thriving or if the business isn't thriving, feeling fun or having fun feels very irresponsible. Like, you should [00:28:00] be working, you should be scaling. There's always more to do. Um, so you do skip the dinner with your friends, or you do cancel the weekend away or.
[00:28:08] You tell yourself consistently that you'll have fun later after this launch or after this quarter, or, oh no. Like when I've hit the goal, but guess what? Later Never comes and. You can tell me straight. That is true, right? You wonder why you're burnt out. You wonder why in the success that you do that you're having and that you've had already feels really heavy.
[00:28:31] And to be honest, why you can't fucking enjoy what you've built anyway. And that is because your subconscious thinks that fun and success don't go together. If you're having fun, you are not working hard enough. Missy. If you are successful, you've earned it through sacrifice. Hmm, yes. How about that? So fun jumps out the window.
[00:28:54] Can't remember the last time you had it, but actually the cost of that is that you're building a business [00:29:00] that you actually resent, um, and you end up feeling quite bored. Or boring because you're not having fun. So, couple of questions around that. Like what becomes magnetic about you when you are genuinely enjoying your life instead of just trying to grind through it.
[00:29:20] Because actually, if we talk about that, those imaginary goalposts that I always talk about, you are constantly grinding to that next milestone. You get to the next milestone, and then that milestone's not good enough. So off you go on the grind again, and then you, you're 80 and here we are. Not enjoying anything 'cause you're just constantly moving the goalpost.
[00:29:38] Yes. Like as you imagine the version of you who's built this sustainable success that you want, is she miserable or is she having the time of her fricking life? Like when you think about why you started this business in the first place. Was it to create a life that you love? I know the [00:30:00] answer is yes.
[00:30:01] Right now, are we in a life that you tolerate, that you grit your teeth and you go, no, it's because I'm building the business. Yeah. The fun doesn't have to be a reward for success. Like I truly see it as the fuel for it. Like it's where you are in the alpha brainwave states, where your best ideas come from, where your magnetism comes from, like notice yourself laughing and connecting and playing whilst your business continues to thrive.
[00:30:29] Yeah, that's where we wanna be, baby. That's where we wanna be. So the actual work here is identify the pattern. Like what are you sacrificing? Is it when your business thrives? What then has to suffer when you focus on your health? What slips? What have I said today? That's really. Slapped you in the face.
[00:30:52] 'cause you know that's what this podcast is here for. Your subconscious has like a preferred sabotage pattern within this, and I [00:31:00] think once we see it, you can start to interrupt it. But a lot of the time, and what I've spoke about today is the belief underneath it. Like what does your subconscious think will happen if you thrive everywhere at once?
[00:31:13] Name that belief, write it down like we cannot pro like reprogram a belief that you can't see. So hopefully that has built that today. Like what do you want that new belief to be? That's what the questions are really helping you with today. And then I want you to build evidence for that. Prove to your subconscious that you can hold multiple things without one cost in the other, and you can have a great business week and you are present at dinner.
[00:31:40] You can prioritize your health and still show up on your fucking stories. You can invest in fun. And keep selling. And you can have a daughter, the most gorgeous daughter ever, and still have a thriving business. Awesome. You know, and every time you do that, every time you [00:32:00] hold both without going to chuck another one in the bin, you are teaching your subconscious that thriving in multiple areas is safe.
[00:32:08] And that truly is having it all. Um, and like I said at the beginning of the podcast, like I know like. Having it all doesn't mean doing everything at once. I know that like, it doesn't mean being a superhuman like I, I want you to know, like it means that you can hold multiple things without your subconscious forcing you to sacrifice one.
[00:32:32] When another goes really well, business can go well and your relationship can be absolutely the best thing ever. I've got it. You can prioritize your health and you can still show up consistently in your business. I got it. We can be present with family and we can still be building something wildly successful.
[00:32:50] Hey, I'm doing it like you can have fun and be ambitious. They're not in competition, so you just have to teach your subconscious that [00:33:00] thriving everywhere isn't dangerous. That is the work. That is the work, right. Thank you for listening. I know I've been on my soapbox a little bit today, but I've absolutely loved it.
[00:33:11] If you have loved it, drop into my dms. I love hearing that you're listening. I love hearing that you're resonating, and I will see you on the next episode.
More about The Subconscious Expert:
Welcome to The Subconscious Expert, the podcast where your subconscious becomes your one-way ticket to the mind-blowing results you desire in your life and business! I’m your host, Rebecca Haydon, The Subconscious Expert who went from being stuck in victim mode to a multi 6 figure business owner. Each week, I will be giving you the subconscious tools and techniques so you can become the woman who is living out her vision with a life and business that she is truly OBSESSED with. I have said it before, and I will say it 100 times again: "Your business can't outgrow your mindset, and if you want to grow your business, it always starts with growing your subconscious." So let's dive into the subconscious breakthrough you so deeply deserve!